December 2018 – Ruth Newell

Yeah! So this is a painting in progress but it is not going well well. I like the shoes. I like the fashion blurb but the text should be more confident, more brash…bigger, looser not a cut-out from a magazine. I like the idea …a door, a woman reflecting, contemplating but for me the layout isn’t working so far. The head is too small. The door is too thin. I am not sure if what I plan next will rescue it. Here is my inspiration:

Art piece MY DOORSTEP by Zim artist Mpumelelo Dube – his orange and blue walls, his dominant blue door with touches of white, his white windows with hints of blue mirror and black outlines, his brown floor all giving an illusion of depth.

Then, art piece LUNAR II by another Zim artist called Phillipa Browne where she uses a technique of waxing over her acrylic painting with crayons and then scrapes over the wax crayon creating texture I guess and definately more vibrancy to the piece.

I am going to work on these ideas in my own way and see if this painting becomes something I like…

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Making collages out of my poems..

I haven’t followed any techniques in these two collages! Here is a collage I made after typing out my first poem called

Closing the door (19.03.2010) :

Here is another collage after typing out my second poem called:

How to be a mother (25.03.2010)

20181212_132333 — How to be a mother (collage in progress)

I am going to keep going, but now using the different collage techniques in my mindmap, exploring and discovering what I like and what works. With perseverance I could fill a wall of my collages based on each poem to see which stand out and say it all : this is trauma!

20181212_132401 — 7Keyhole idea for new collage.

Use torn paper in different shades like artist Beenon Cutaaya:

Revisiting PTSD…

This is a pile of my poems written over 3 years. The poems reflect PTSD.

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The question I am having to ask myself is, does my art reflect PTSD?!

Here is what Post traumatic stress disorder is in a nutshell. This is a bullet point list of my symptoms and recovery. I think by revisiting it, my art can become more focused:

Trauma from being exposed to a dangerous, unexpected, life threatening event / trapped, hidden in a space from danger / what I thought was safe in life proved otherwise / intense fear, helplessness, terror / frozen trauma memory (hippocampus) / stress hormones blow a fuse / brain unfreezes every trauma memory in a safe place / it is like a maze you have to work through to get out / re-experiencing trauma : triggers, flashbacks, bad dreams, scary thoughts / staying away from reminders (people, places, things) / feel on edge, alert, ready for danger 24/7, can’t sleep or eat or take responsibility or concentrate / feel detached from close friends and family (negative thoughts, distorted feelings, emotionally numb to those close to before) / depression / no support before, no support after / PTSD shows up 6 months later / important: felt good about proaction during danger, learnt from bad event to make a positive daily program to build me up, writing therapy, talk therapy, counselling with flower essences, healthy diet, walking, tennis coaching, horse riding lessons, swimming lengths, climbing mountains, morning core exercises, breathing exercises, prayer, Bible reading, journaling, writing poems, gratitude diary, spa days.

Illustrating these ideas of PTSD conditions and treatment may enlighten or support someone! I want to combine painting, or collage with text (poem part of it) straight out of suffering even if it looks scary. Remember Basquiat These are mental wounds exposed for well-being. Remember Faye Heft in theillustratedpatientblog

Statement about my art practice

I am mostly a conceptual artist because I am more concerned about the ideas involved in my work than the actual piece. What I mean, is that I plan and decide before doing the art so my idea becomes the machine that makes my art. I like to do a lot of research. It is like a tool. Behind my creative process I have a chosen idea. For example, when I did a head sculpture it was in the spirit of Aztec god sculptures which I was so taken with, that I tried to make an expression of my own God. It was my suffering God with a nod to a pieta! I like to work with clay; to collage with text; to make books; to cut, paint and hang wood and metal; to paint on cardboard. I like doing photograms and photography. I like installation work and have done two pieces at university, both inspired by a visit to Morocco which involved textile work, mirrors, painted wooden creations. The ideas were privacy, gender roles, other cultures. Always with me, the ideas and concerns come first, then research and then I choose the media. The media differs depending on what themes I am concerned with. Sometimes it is simple, like ‘the wave’, painted woodcuts, 2014, Barry College. Issues like God, culture, suffering these are always important to me. I can’t really mention a specific media I use because what interests me is the freedom to choose each time. It depends on the link between the issue I am dealing with. Three artists that are relevant to my art are Basquiat, Hockney and Matisse. It is about their freedom in expression and colour but mostly I like to start fresh with each new series or piece. My experience of living in other cultures and countries all my life has a bearing on my work because it gives me a ‘third’ eye where I hope I am better able to think outside the ‘cultural’ box and put myself in another’s shoes and cross over cultural bridges! I like to think it means my work has a broader picture; that it is more open. What ties my pieces, over the years, together is my constant search for a unique and loose expression of real life issues that inspire me. I struggle to travel on this road. My intention behind the work I do is to touch people’s hearts; to invite them to see what I see; to know what I know; to experience what I have experienced. I want to share this ‘wealth’ I have with others. I like to believe that a broader perspective will bring more tolerance, more acceptance and more love between different peoples.

the wave, 2016

The Wave